This one has been a hard one lately because as I’ve said on more than one occasion, I’ve always been the peacemaker, often giving up what I want to make someone else more comfortable or happy. I never wanted to offend or rock the boat. I was opinionated for sure but I always had good rapport with my bosses and they always respected my opinion. This is my first job that I’ve not been treated well. It’s culture shock to say the least.
It’s always been in my nature to make the places I work better than I left them. I had that attitude at this job at first but after a while and SO much struggle, I decided it wasn’t worth it. I was going to quit one day in July of 2020. I had an email halfway typed out to the coaches and to their managers. I wish I had the exact wording but it said something to the effect that this was hands down the worst job I’ve ever had, but there were good people worth hanging onto. (I still believe that) I started a list, and right at that moment I was disrupted from my email to attend an ethics call. (Not having to to with me) I remember having a conversation with one of the coaches telling her that I was thinking of quitting and that I had prayed about it. She didn’t encourage me or try to stop me.
A few hours later, I went to her about the strange emails from “Shaun Batterton”. She told me “if you’re innocent you have nothing to worry about.” She also said that “there are cameras everywhere.”
The thing about that was, a few months prior, I had told Shaun Batterton that I had someone hacking me. He asked a few strange questions, he asked “are there computers in the area?” I said “yes, but for work use only.” Then he asked if there were cameras in the area. I told him I thought there were, even though I knew that was false. Everyone would be fired for always being on their phones if that was the case. I still don’t know why I answered “yes” to that question. Maybe it was because my stalker had installed a camera to watch the walking beam in my area around the same time as these interactions. The camera is still there to this day. (Zone 5,cell 30)
When the coach told me “There are cameras everywhere” that is when it clicked for me, but not entirely. It took me three days to realize what was going on. I had a lot of guidance from our Heavenly Father that weekend. It was disorienting. I needed guidance and I wasn’t going to church and I wasn’t the praying type.
I’ve become the praying type. I’ve wanted to quit almost every day since then, but I know that I was prevented from quitting that day. If I would’ve quit, I would never have known who was stalking me and he wouldn’t have stopped. He hasn’t stopped. I have to see this through, no matter how uncomfortable I make the people around me, and no matter how much I rock the boat. I have always quit when things got too hard, but this time I can’t. I won’t.
I’ve always been taught to love my neighbor as myself. I try to but unfortunately there comes a time for ‘righteous judgment’. I don’t mean anybody any harm but as I’ve said on more than one occasion, “I will defend myself.”
Today’s App Message:
Elder Gary E. Stevenson
Elder Stevenson’s talk emphasized how we should show love and kindness to all people we associate with.
Who is someone you could show increased kindness to this week?
When asked, “Master, which is the great commandment?” the Savior replied to “love the Lord thy God with all thy heart,” followed by, “Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.” The Savior’s response reinforces our heavenly duty. An ancient prophet commanded “that there should be no contention one with another, but that [we] should look forward … , having [our] hearts knit together in unity and in love one towards another.”…
President M. Russell Ballard has also taught that Latter-day Saints must be kind not only to each other but also to everyone around us. He observed: “Occasionally I hear of members offending those of other faiths by overlooking them and leaving them out. This can occur especially in communities where our members are the majority. I have heard about narrow-minded parents who tell children that they cannot play with a particular child in the neighborhood simply because his or her family does not belong to our Church. This kind of behavior is not in keeping with the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. I cannot comprehend why any member of our Church would allow these kinds of things to happen. … I have never heard the members of this Church urged to be anything but loving, kind, tolerant, and benevolent to our friends and neighbors of other faiths.”
The Lord expects us to teach that inclusion is a positive means toward unity and that exclusion leads to division…
As we look through a gospel lens, we recognize that we too are under the watchcare of a compassionate caregiver, who extends Himself in kindness and a nurturing spirit. The Good Shepherd knows each one of us by name and has a personal interest in us. The Lord Jesus Christ Himself said: “I am the good shepherd, and know my sheep. … And I [will] lay down my life for the sheep.”
Elder Gary E. Stevenson
36 Master, which is the great commandment in the law?
37 Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.
38 This is the first and great commandment.
39 And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.